Thinx panties review. Alternative options for your period

15 years ago I stopped using regular tampons and sanitary napkins when I was introduced to softcups. When I had trouble finding them in MTL, I decided to seek out other ways of managing my period.
I tried going back to regular pharmacy type products just to have unbearable itching and irritation, not good.
I came across Lunapads from Vancouver, and bought 3 pairs of their underwear, they where underwear with built in absorbent pads. I was super happy and used them for 2-3 years.
When I tried re-ordering some years later I found out the style I had gotten were no longer available.  I ordered a new style and was disappointed with them. The cut and fit was uncomfortable and the removable inserts moved around and you had to pay extra for thicker ones.
When a couple of months ago on facebook one of my friends liked a link for Thinx, I got excited to see maybe I had found a ideal sexy alternative to my loved lunapanties.
I found out they were a woman run company, and carried plus size.
Their product claimed to carry 2 tampons worth of blood in the panties, they were also cute as hell especially the high waisted mesh undies.

Because why shouldn't you feel sexy while you body expels blood and tissue out of your vagina!
I also ordered their hip huggers because they where for heavier flow days.
I got them pretty fast, but was pretty mortified with the packaging, it was not discreet.
Now I am not embarrassed I have my period, but my postman does not need to know about my period options.

Ya, I know.
So the underwear where nice, fit well. The high waisted made me feel sexy retro. I could not wait for my period to come, and... it didn't because hey pre-menopause, fuck your review.

When I finally did use them I quickly found out (when I bleed though my panties 2h in on my first day) that these would not hold 2 tampons worth.
I went though 3 pairs on my first day. 
At $49.99 plus shipping each, this makes a very expensive period, I would need 5 pairs for the 24h and some extra to wear while I wash the ones from the previous day. Crazy!
When I use my softcups on my heaviest days I have to empty them every 3 h, so NO way this holds the amount claimed. So disappointed.
The high waisted undies still make me feel sexy, but I now wear them with my softcups (I found again on amazon) BUT when I sit they roll under my belly, sigh.

I would say this is okay, but the company should review it claim for absorbency and have a more discreet packaging.
I keep em for special occasions and end of period celebrations, like eating eclairs in my underwear while crying at commercials.

Deandri Product review.

Hello lovelies! it's been ages.
I won't go into why it's been so long and how sorry I am to have neglected my blog.
Now to write a couple of long past due reviews.
Today Deandri, the brand I love, but also fills me frustration.
I found out about this online clothing store via fellow blogger  Brxtrmn, I was excited that this gorgeous clothing line had plus size, was made locally in the US and was next level gothiness.

I fell for the Nosferatu dress, hard.

Interchangeable collars, puff sleeves *swoon*! 

This is where I encountered my first problem; the size chart stopped at 3xl, they go to 5x but no way of knowing what the measurements for that are. 

So I emailed them, no response. I commented on their facebook page and instagram, nothing, others commented having the same frustration.

I went ahead and ordered anyway, in 3 x to be safe, because my love was strong for this! Gah!

I got it 3 weeks later, without a notice that it had shipped or anything from website.

It's gorgeous, but super tight on my 2x body, but I still love it, it make me feel like an Amish slut! Garr!

So when they had a black friday sale and I saw  the Clementine dress on sale I jumped on it, again no size chart so I decided to go for a 4x to have a bit more wiggle room. 

I got it 3 weeks later this time with a tracking number to stalk my shipment arrival.  I got it andddd it did not fit! As in wayyy to small, as in smaller than my 3x Nosferatu! 

FUCKKKKK! Plus loose treads, like long ass treads everywhere. 

Contact customer service: 3x via website, 2x via email, comment on instagram then pm them on instagram to finally get a reply. Wow for customer service!

Tell them my issue, they said to send it back, so I did.

I received my replacement 5x dress 3 week later, annnd it's the wrong dress!!!

They sent me a Madeline duster instead of the clementine, which is more expensive but it open in front. FOR THE LOVE OF S8TAN!!

Contacted customer support via email and instagram, never got a reply.

 So I waited two weeks, put snaps on the front and called it a day. 

Here are some pictures of the dress worn both ways (front to back & back to front)

 The dress is nice, but I don't think dealing with the shit customer service is worth it. So disappointing on so many level.
This ranks as a half dead succulent of the witchy happiness level.

Adieu

  

The beauty of "Lâcher prise"

Okay I have not blogged in MONTHS, I have been going through the process of finding out what is wrong with my health.

Well it turns out I am not going crazy, I just have Fibromyalgia.

This is no surprise to me as all the women on my mother's side have it.What did surprise me is how drastically it has changed my life.

Overnight ( well in the last 6 months) I went from running 2.3 km a day to not being able to walk a block. Losing partial motor functions in my hands.
I went through weeks of crying, being depressed, wondering if I was going to be tired/depressed/in pain for the rest of my life.
I felt like a burden to my family. I felt I was alone and no one could understand my pain and exhaustion.

I fought it, became angry and finally now accepting the new "reality" without  feeling like I am simply giving up.
I am learning my limitations, someways I feel good, I dress up, put on makeup.
Other days, I need help dressing myself and walk around in a daze.
I had to get use to asking for help and forgiving myself  when I cannot do "what I feel I need to do". Not being ashamed of not being "polished" in front of people, not fearing my husband would leave me or lose my job.

Lâcher prise in French. Which roughly translates to let control go.
That in itself has been terrifying and uncomfortable but I have no choice.
BUT... it's also liberating.

The world has not come to an end because laundry (or all the things on my to do list) is not all done.
So this is my new "normal".
Somedays are bad and somedays are good.
And on the bad days, there is Netflix with the hubby and dogs and cocktails, many cocktails...
...and that is not all that bad is it?

Hat by Ophelie hats photo by Eric Bergeron

I love this picture!

Why do I love this picture so much?

Well I have been going though some health related stuff, and it left me scared, feeling super low on energy and unsexy and unattractive.
As you may know I struggle with myself, my body. The times I do feel good or sexy, I take (or ask my husband) pictures of me, usually when I see the pictures, it's a process of accepting what I look like, that I don't look as good I as thought I did. it's difficult because it's  a confirmation of how bad I think I look on my bad days.
My inner voice saying:"You see, look how (fat, ugly, silly) you look!
But This picture, well this is different.
First off this awesome stop staring dress I am wearing. I got it at  Boutique Monroe on our wonderful date night with my husband. He bought it for me, and we went for cocktail and dinner with friends and it was amazing. A perfect evening. So when I wear it, it reminds me of that and him.

This picture represents what I think I look like on a good day, how I felt that day still glowing from the previous evening.
Happy to have what I do.

This picture serves as a reminder when I hate myself, or feel weak, that that is not the only me. That deep (or not so deep) inside of me THIS resides.

This picture is me, the real me.




Photo by Eric bergeron

My lightbulb moment on my way to Toronto

Me and my hubby set off Friday to go see friends in T.O.
 On highway 40 we came across a truck with live pigs on the way to slaughter, as we drove along this truck one of the pigs stuck his nose though the little window/air vent and looked straight at me, we made eye contact, it looked at me with an innocence that made me break down and cry.
I said to myself I don't want you to die for me.

I was a vegetarian in the past, for 10 years actually.  But Greece back in the 80's was a hard place to be a vegetarian.
 Things got better, but by  then I had managed to convince myself not to think of the animals.

I would get disgusted with meat sometimes, but block it out.
In the last couple of years, me and my husband have been toying with the idea, he often finds the idea of meat disgusting too, but hey it makes for easy meal planning.

Recently, for health reasons we have had to  change our diet drastically, so after talking about it, we have decided to cut all meat except chicken, fish  and  eggs.

Now it know, chickens, eggs and fish are not quite vegetarian, but this is a transitional period for us.
I have a soy intolerance that make being a vegetarian tricky.

So for now, we are semi vegetarians. 

It will be very interesting to see how our body changes with this new dietary change. I am sure there will be tweaking to do, but I am excited to see all the new yummy foods we can make.
And I love a challenge.
RIP piggy, you did not die in vain.

Something lost and something found

 We decided last Saturday to go to Hudson, we had not been in over a year and wanted to see our little lake we pic nick by and the antique store we often buy little things from.  I was feeling pretty good after being included in an article on buzzfeed.
My killer glasses and matching spiked Michel Kors gloves I bought in Atlanta  added to this.
I had been feeling pretty poopy as of lately and this article made me feel special. The author had said to my husband who he was sending pictures to that I was beautiful.

 I remember saying: That's funny! to which my husband said: why?
I thought to myself, oh shit, why indeed? why do I find it funny that someone should think I'm beautiful.
Is it the years of abusive relationships? Me being fat? The fact I've felt weird/ugly/stupid for most of my life (apart from a brief time in my 20's).

And then I said, no I am passed all this. I am okay with myself  in my 40's, I feel good 60% of the time, which is HUGE for me.

Then this Saturday, as me and Eric walked to a record store and a cute young 20 year old man smiled at me, and I-felt -crazy uncomfortable.
Why is he smiling ? What's wrong with me?    Indeed, what  THE-Fuck-is wrong with me? 

All this work  into self acceptance, and someone looks at me and BAM!
I wish I could say I have a plan on how to stop it, I don't. I just try and be conscious of when I do it. It help that I have a great support team.
So to get back to my story, we arrive in Hudson and the lake, and it's  gone. It seems the dam broke, and the city is broke, so the water emptied and the lake is gone. We stuck to our plan and took some shots next to the ''Lake'' .
I am wearing a vintage wool coat and beret.
Top was bought at value village, skirt by Dorothy Perkins.
Stocking from Addition elle, boots are from Modcloth.
Bag is vintage.

When we got to the village we found out the antique store is being bulldozed to make condos.
Sad.
We had a wonderful day even if things we loved are gone. We found a new lake and walked in the forest.
So maybe that's my plan, acknowledge the sadness, then find a new lake or a $40 vintage 70's coat! woot!

Photos by Eric.Bergeron                          

What a wonderfully dreadful day for a picnic

I realize it's been way too long since I posted, alas crazy work hours and running a side doggy bakery business can take it's toll.
I needed some me recoup time. Yay me!
I say this because I used to run myself into the ground or the hospital. I have learned to spot the signs and now I stop before it gets to that point.
Anyhow!
Saturday was the wiener dog races, this year it was more of a picnic. I was very excited to get to see my dogs that live with my x. I picked my clothes out in function of this cute retro lunchbox my hubby bought me a while back.

The problem is it was pissing rain, oh and I broke my toe making lemon meringue pie!
Sooo my plan to wear cute shoes was out the window.
So what's a gal to do?
Grab your sword umbrella, to ward off picnicking ninjas of course!

 Fuck you ninja get your own granola bars...
So here is the outfit I picked for the pic nic.
A Torrid retro chic skull and dice dress I bought from a plus size exchange group, it's cute and is very forgiving to my swollen nacho filled belly.

I paired it with a simple cardigan.

As you can see, my ugly flip flop wearing feet are not shown. Imagine I am wearing something fabulous.

The races were fun but wet. One of my dogs had a great time the other was a drooling mess of a dog, her slobber picking up random objects as she walked.

She was a sad sight, like her mama's swollen toe. Squeaky toy for her, tall vodka slushy for me.

Photos again by my amazing hubby.