Ferrys, dresses and New York

So I just got back from a trip to New York with my husband and step son, we had a blast even though some things went wrong.

The day started with us realizing the driver's mirror had been ripped/smashed off the car. We took a deep sigh and decided to go to the Fred Perry surplus, which should not be called an surplus. 10$ off is not a sale or a worthwhile discount, shame on you Fred Perry!

Then decided to walk the williamsburg bridge it was nice, I felt comfortable in my Eshakti hula girl dress I bought from a plus size facebook group. The bust is a little revealing so I paired it with a sweater and fake teeth pin I made.

The bag you may recognize from last week post, the shoes are not so pretty comfy flats for days of walking around. I bought them at ardene.

My hair skulls I got from Trash and vaudeville, I love em. As an old /x punk I have been visiting this place since the mid 80's. We bought these while visiting the east side the day before.

We then thought the boy should see the statue of liberty as it is his first time in NY, so we took the Ferry.

This is me on the Staten island ferry looking unimpressed at the screaming 4 years old in the quiet area.
Looking back, we had fun and made the best out of bad situations.

Like getting locked out of our Airbnb because the host left without giving us a key. What did we do?

 We watched funny videos, told dirty jokes and drank vodka/7up  from a plastic bottle.

Because videos of cat getting brain freeze is so much funnier when you've had a couple.

And all that matters is that you are with the ones you love out of the rain and under a roof.

Junk sales and cotton dresses

After last weeks post I spent some time trying to get out of my funk.
 I finally did, but this week's OOTD photo shoot was hard for me to look at, but I will not dwell on that right now.
 I am trying to put a stop to my criticizing of myself, and that is part of what this whole project is about.

Besides, it's  the most wonderful  time of the year, garage sale season.
So we set off sat morning to St-Anne de Bellvue, we got halfway down the street and bought 8 vintage glasses and a tie rack so wonderfully tacky it make my husband giddy. But enough about that.

I am wearing a dress I bought on Eshakti, I hear a lot of trash talk about their bad fitting dresses but so far I have been super happy with everything I got.
This dress is cotton, so super comfy for summer and has those little bra straps restrainers so you don't spend all your time controlling those little fuckers. It's navy blue and makes me feel pretty.

It also has pockets, so that's always a plus. You can choose to remove them but who would do that? I cannot think of any woman that would not want pockets on a dress. You can keep change for buying other people's shit or put garage sale maps you cannot follow. Ok, ya back to clothes!

My Shoes are from Iron fist I bought them on sale on Modcloth, they have weird goldfish mutant fish on them and bows, because bows rule.

My bag, is a garage sale find, not in a garage sale. It's a vintage wicker basket bag I picked up in a goodwill type place for $5. I love it. My husband proudly found it for me.

Even though our day of yard scavenging was not what we hoped for, we got lost and angry at all the kid's junk people had to sell, In the end all that mattered is that we spent time together as we like to.

Ya, I look at my pictures and see a lot of cringe worthy stuff I don't like about myself but like our day stuff does not always go as we want, we don't look as we want, but you can't just stop yourself. Put away that map in your fabulous dress pocket and wing it. Photos by Eric Bergeron

fake it untill you feel it.

Last couple of week have been hard for me, my body & age issues have come to the surface a lot, I have no idea if they coincide with the fact my runs have been so bad or finding out I am losing my job at the end of the summer.
In short I have felt not very attractive or sexy for a while now. But since this blog is manly for my own personal growth I have decided to share when thing are not so great as well.
Don't get me wrong I love being in my forties, but sometimes I feel like ''who am I kidding with this pink hair?'' and this becomes more apparent as I start looking for work. I have gotten to a point where I feel I am too old to compromise when it comes to things I feel strongly about, like working weekends, I won't.
 I cherish this time with my husband, dogs and family, it's my reason for being.without it I have no quality of life.
I am not looking for a career, I have my dog bakery business, I am looking for steady, interesting 9-5 part-time work. Sounds easy?
Funny, not a lot of people want to employ a tattooed 40 years old with 20 years experience.

But enough about my job search, what the hell is wrong with me?
I have an amazing husband, stepson, mom. My dogs are healthy, so is my family. I live surrounded by the things and people I love, so why can't I feel good about myself? I am the healthiest I have ever been, the most mentally stable.
I have no idea, but for now, I will slap on some make up, throw on some clothes and put one foot in front of the other.
I will fake till I feel it.